The Myth of the Olive Garden

Are you one of those people that have seen the commercials for the Olive Garden, but have never actually seen one? Well then, you are not alone. The myth of the Olive Garden has seemingly affected us all, though it's futileness never encourages us to speak out about it.
MAD TV decided to point out the elephant in the room though and mock the obvious absurdness of the supposed wonderful bistro that brings overtly happy families together.
MAD TV wasn't the only one either. My friend Christine decided to finally track down this Italian oasis and make an outing of it. Luckily, she invited me and when the word got out, we found ourselves with a party of 12. Apparently, the curiosity about the Olive Garden has secretly attained a lot more people than we thought.

After locating the nearest Olive Garden, we set out to butt-fuck Burbank to find ourselves in an enormous strip mall with a plethora of capitalist consumerism. It was all there! After taking about 15 minutes to park (the strip mall was happening) we strolled up to the quaint faux-rock/faux-Italy restaurant. We were surprised to find out that apparently everyone on the world knew where this little haven was... It was packed. Thankfully, we had a made a reservation, because our wait time would have been a whopping 2 hours if we hadn't.
We did still had to wait though, so Christine and I decided to get some drinks at the bar at the entrance of the restaurant. I got a Bloody Mary and she got a Cosmo and they were stiff. We were all giggly before we were even seated. Maybe this was due to us starving ourselves a bit during the day so that we could accommodate the endless bread sticks and salad that were coming our way. We were finally seated and cordially greeted by our waiters with name tags and ties. It was just one big faux atmosphere, trying to trick the masses into thinking that they were experiencing some fine dining.

The meal was gross. The soup was gross. The pasta was gross. The wine was strong thick vinegar. The best part of the evening was the infinite bread sticks. And the waiter managed to spill marinara sauce in my hair which resulted in me getting a free meal :) Thanks Olive Garden!

All in all though, the Olive Garden's slogan is that they bring people together and through the ambiguity of their supposed extewnsive amount of locations, they did bring 12 eager young people together, passing a night of laughter in ridicule of the evening or laughter because that is just what happens when friends are brought together. *sigh*